"Lads! Jolly good to stumble upon yer site! Missin good ole Edmund... god rest his soul...""Now what the Charles Dickens is happening in Glastonbury, Connecticut? Have yar all gone mental? Yanks beatin the stones and pies outta yar each week? Three bloody losses... to boot! Sure reads like yer need to try lagering up before the next match! And while you're at it... why not... make yar next brew... my new Oswald Catpunt Shades of Summer Ale! Brewed in the exotic rivers of India! God save the Queen! Steady lads on Sunday!"
Oswald "shot stopper" Catpunt
Founding Loyalist, the best bloody Goalkeeper that ever played the game!
- Born in a lorry
- Favorite tea: "cripes, man! lager! no need for the extra tea calories!"
- Published a book on the spelling of lager. It sold briskly in his home town.
- After reporting for service with the Bengal Army, he was lost during a skirmish with an unidentified enemy.
- Rumored for years to be building a secret lager empire in the Himalayas
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